Lockdown was kind of great at times; it forced us all to take a step back, slow down and take stock of everything that was truly important to us. For some, lockdown meant a significantly slower and smaller world, whereas for others who had to juggle working from home with home-schooling their kids, running a household and staying sane, it meant complete chaos and burn out.
I fell into the former category. For me, lockdown closed down my world to some extent. The first half of my lockdown experience was spent in my apartment in Dubai where I fortunately didn’t have to work from home or even worry about anyone besides myself. I had the luxury of time which I used on my own personal projects, creative endeavours, self-care practices and really getting in tune with who I was and what I needed in life. The second half of my lockdown experience has been spent back at home in Gillitts where suddenly, my world has filled up and sped up. Instead of only being concerned with my own welfare, I now have my partner beside me, our two dogs and our cat. I have a home to run amidst a full-on house renovation where privacy and quiet spaces are scarce. I spend hours each day working on my blog and business and have found my self-care slip to the bottom of my daily ‘to-do’ list.
Lockdown made me forget about how stressful and busy normal life could be. With endless hours available for the things that I leisurely felt like doing each day, I got lulled into this strange, blissful universe where I felt no pressure, no sense of urgency and no need for juggling. Transitioning back into a more “normal” routine filled with jobs, side hustles, weekend plans, chores, bills to pay and seemingly not enough time for any of it, I’m deeply reminded of just how overwhelming life can get, despite how much we may love it all.
This got me thinking and once again, forced me to slow down and consider what this all meant and what it was trying to teach me. I reflected on the important lessons I learnt in Dubai regarding my own personal happiness and sense of purpose and tried to figure out how I could fit it all in without having to sacrifice what was truly important to me. In those spaces where life feels too large, too heavy and too chaotic, how do we move a little slower and reconnect with ourselves so that we can continue to live an intentional and mindful life? When we find ourselves in a time where everything is demanding our energy and attention, how do we save some of us for ourselves?
SELF-CARE DOES NOT NEED TO TAKE UP A LOT OF TIME
Self-care can take up as much time as we want it to. When life is moving a little slower and we have the luxury of being able to spend hours on ourselves let’s grab it. But often time life is moving at a neck-breaking pace and it can feel like a struggle to fit everything into one day. In times when life feels too large and we’re overwhelmed by endless to-do lists, it’s so important to remember that self-care does not need to take up a lot of time in order to be effective.
A mindful cup of coffee by yourself is self-care. Preparing a nutritious meal is self-care. Listening to an uplifting podcast on your drive to work is self-care. Going to bed early when you’re feeling run down is self-care. Sometimes I feel like my personal self-care has to look a certain way because it’s what I’ve become accustomed to; journaling, meditation, exercise, painting. But sometimes there’s just not enough time or energy and in those moments we need to allow smaller tasks to be done with mindfulness and gratitude so that they can nourish us in the same way that a longer practice might.
MIND OVER MATTER
Self-care is not necessarily about WHAT you do, but about HOW you do it. It’s about the mindset you do things with. Our lives are not determined by our external circumstances but by the way we narrate them in our minds through our emotions, judgements, ideas and insecurities. When life is feeling overwhelming the most effective thing you can do to look after yourself is work on your own mindset. Life doesn’t become more manageable and nourishing through thoughts fuelled by anxiety, worry, stress and frustration. If we can take just 10 minutes a day to become more mindful and intentional about the thoughts we’re carrying with us through our day we won’t need to do as much to look after ourselves, because we will naturally move into a more positive and empowered space.
AWARENESS IS KEY
The first step in self-care is the awareness that you need to look after yourself. When life is overwhelming we often get pulled into this rat race where we barely spare a thought for ourselves and what we need until we hit rock bottom. Even on the days where you haven’t been able to engage in a self-care practice of some kind, being aware of the fact that it’s something you need and it’s something that you’re not getting to in the way you’d like is important. Awareness keeps something prioritized in your mind and helps you to keep working towards it instead of letting it slip out of reach.
PRIORITISE YOUR NEEDS
We schedule our meetings, our admin tasks, our chores and our social engagements. So why don’t we schedule the things that we need to do for our own wellbeing? Saying ‘no’ to other people and obligations in order to meet your own needs is not selfish, it’s a necessity. In today’s world where we seem to be connected 24/7, we’re in a position where we will give, and give, and give until we consciously decide not to. These are our boundaries and they’re important to protect our wellbeing. Prioritise the things you need to do for yourself each day just like you would something you felt you needed to do for someone else.
We don’t need to do everything every single day. But we do need to look after ourselves because we cannot give from an empty cup and when we don’t feel our best it’s impossible to give our best to the things that are important to us.
How do you manage your self-care practice when life feels too large?